Stolen directly from Dorothy Surrenders because I could not have said it better:

Oh, Bea. Where would we be without you? Where would all the big, bold, brassy broads of the world be without Bea? From “Mame” to “Maude” to Dorothy, Bea Arthur was funny, feminist and fantastic. Whether with a simple look, a perfectly-timed zinger or full-on verbal machete attack, Bea did not suffer fools, but rather sliced and diced them down to size. That she was hilarious was one thing, that she was inspiring was altogether another. She gave countless girls permission to be smart and opinionated, funny and brash. Her shows, “Maude” and “The Golden Girls,” touched on everything from abortion to homosexuality, divorce to ageism, sexuality and – most important of all – female friendship. Which is also why so many of us took her passing this weekend so personally. We grew up with her, we looked up to her. She was always there to help show us the way. Bea knew who she was and was comfortable in her own skin. As she once told an interviewer: “Look – I'm 5-feet-9, I have a deep voice and I have a way with a line. What can I do about it? I can't stay home waiting for something different. I think it's a total waste of energy worrying about typecasting.” So thank you, Bea. Thank you for being yourself and – of course – a friend.


Bea Arthur has always been one of those icons that is ever present in my life. She was a tall, strong woman who was always characterized as speaking her mind. She had a wardrobe that only another tall girl could covet, and a voice that a budding lesbian could lust over.

We are losing our icons. What are we doing to replace them?

does it always have to be difficult?

I am getting so tired of the fact that every part of my life is hard. I never seem to get an easy choice, an easy path, an easy way.

But then here i sit pouting....and other people have it so much more difficult.

I am trying not to generalize. I am trying not to blow one feeling into something that takes over my whole mood.

I am annoyed with my water faucet. A few months ago, it began to leak. Most people would go out and get a new sprayer head and hose and fix it. or call a plumber. but in my world both of those are beyond the budget. so i make do. Tapes were useless, and epoxies a waste of time so then there was the clip to hold the hose from slipping into the housing. When that disintegrated, i found some rubberbands that worked, but they too disintegrate.

This afternoon, I was in the midst of making gallons of sugarfree jello. My fingers are stained red, my counter is stained red, and in the middle of it all, going for cold water, my faucet decided to baptise me, the counters and the stove.

Sigh.

its just water, right?

i want an iphone

it is an irrational desire. I have a cell phone that I love (LG Dare) it has access to everything i need. Phone, internet, email. chat, i can get twitter notifications, and texts and photos. It has an awesome camera, and i have had an LG phone for years, and love the way they work. I am also a very happy Verizon customer. I get service everywhere I need it and have had awesome customer service.

But I am a mac girl! I have always had a Mac, and will always. I love Mac gadgetry. I have had a number of ipods (and still have them) from the basic white brick to the red nano with video. I have never been the earliest of adopters, but i am usually at least a second rev adopter. I am a mac addict, mac enthusiast, and truly a mac evangelist. I like the products, I like the attitudes, I like the desgin. By the time I got my first PDA, the Newton was history, but the Handspring was the next closest thing. only once for a period of time, did I not run the latest OS (because it required a hardware upgrade that I could not afford).

My friend R is the early adopter. Single gay man, my mac guru, he has always had the means and the desire., and has been very good at sharing what he is replacing, so I can get new hardware at reduced prices. I drooled when R got his first iPhone. I lusted, i dreamed, i complained loudly about being unable to spend that kind of money on a cell phone. But i wanted one. my flip phone could do gps and it had a pretty good camera....but it wasnt an iphone.

iPhones are more. they have applications, they are more computers than they are just cell phones. The blackberry thinks it can compete....but it is a different kind of thing. I do not find the blackberry at all interesting. But the one hitch in the program is that Verizon does not support the iPhone. In fact, ATT is the only carrier. Not only am i not willing to give up Verizon, I am NOT going to go to ATT. They have poor service, bad customer service and i just don't like them. So I am stuck. as much as i want my iphone, my dare will have to fill the gap.

Spring has sprung. My first Crocus!

gardening has begun

over the last week i have begun planting seeds in little starters. one tray is all sprouted, and the other two trays are still in process.

we have beets and zucchini, sqaush and cucumbers, swiss chard and tomatoes, Brussels sprouts and garlic chives, sage and thyme and of course basil.

after a winter of frozen veggies and minimal fresh, it is exciting to get the garden going now.

The downside, of course, is the fact that it is 34F and snow is in the forecast. (actually the little weather monitors on my computer say it is snowing, but looking out my window says that is not the case right here!!)

BUT its very encouraging to see a tray full of sprouts. (photo documentation to follow)

PDA's

And no, I do not refer to hand-held organizers.
Public Displays of Affection.
Holding hands, affectionate kisses, touches, hugs.
Where do you stand on them?

I ask because on another blog I read, there is a discussion that is bothering me big time.

A lesbian couple out at a sporting event observed a transperson being harassed, and were not comfortable saying anything.
She took the conversation further discussing how uncomfortable she is with the idea of holding hands with her girlfriend.

I have read the comments mostly congratulating her on not responding to the harassers, and staying safe. And also about not holding hands unless they are comfortable.

The more I read, the angrier i got. How homophobic. Let the tranny fend for themselves, and heaven forbid you hold your sweeties hand.

There were one or two people who had the opposite perspective, but by far the majority was all about being safe, and staying safe.

I guess I am not going to sacrifice someone else's safety (the transperson's) or ignore someone being abused. And as much as I am not the crawl all over each other supporter when it comes to PDA's, I refuse to let other peoples bigotry keep me from being normal with a partner/girlfriend.

How will we ever expect to live our lives openly and safely if we hide in our internalized homophobia??? I do understand that some people are afraid for their jobs, their families, their lives even. I do not advocate forcing people to do things that are not safe for them, but I think if we do not step out of our safe little boxes sometimes, we will never be accepted.

sick and over it

I finally finished the big book I was doing, and after the first proofing, my body did the post-apocalyptic collapse thing. In other words work myself into oblivion/exhaustion and then catch whatever bug that is floating around and have it take over.

after 3 solid days of exhaustion, sneezing, coughing, sleeping, blowing my nose, aching, dozing, I am banishing the bug.

Went to get a haircut today and had my long time stylist tell me that my skin and scalp are a mess. Stress its a wonderful thing.
I have a pricy tube of lotion and directions to find some equally pricy crystals to put into my scalp...to allow my skin/scalp to calm down (neutralize). OK...now if i can just find something that will do that for the rest of my life. oh well. my haircut is styled after this photo of Victoria Beckham.




I am significanlty grayer, older, fatter and less made up than she is, but I liked the pixy top with the longer back. NOT a mullet

We are due for a spring snowstorm tomorrow....cold, snowing, blowing. Spring....BAH HUMBUG!

Tests and other thoughts

I have spent this weekend with my nose glued to the computer for the most part, with breaks to attempt to sleep, to cook and eat, and to take a test for a prospective job.
The few brain cells that may have been functioning are threatening to dribble out of my ear.

The test was delivered in audio. All spoken, on tape, with a multiple choice answer sheet and test booklet. The sections were geared to test your listening and discernment skills. Very necessary for the job.

86 people applied, 81 were invited to the test. Test was given to half of us at a time. It took less than an hour. There were no pauses, no room for a cough or a sniffle that might cause you to miss something, no rewinds or repeats.

I think I did ok, but I have no idea if that ok is good enough to move on to the next test.

They will put the top of the tested applicants onto a hiring list. Who knows how many that will be. There is a possibility of 10-12 positions open. The next scheduled training class is in September, but depending on the lay of the land, they may hire as early as May.

Notification of the next step should come in the next two weeks. I want this job. I hesitate to be so specific about it, as my luck has always been counter-intuitive. But I want this job. I would be very good at this job. DO YOU HEAR ME UNIVERSE?

the culmination of thousands of hours of work

is once again almost a finished product.

This time, its a bigger project on my end. In previous years I have proofed, typeset, designed ads, fed the troops and climbed through the sleeping bodies in my hallway to get to MY job.

This year I took a more serious role, and actually took responsibility for the whole project a couple of weeks ago. The months prior to this i was just in a coordination role.

The product is an LGBT resource book. Over 150 listings of local and area organizations of support and interest to the LGBT community, verified as to current contact info, more than 100 ads, solicited, tracked down, tweaked, some designed, catagorised, cross-referenced, indexed and TOC's built.

Only 15 or so hours from being at the printer!!
This is one project I am glad to see gone!
NEVER AGAIN!